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Social Media Losers

Whaddup whaddup, it’s been a while!

I’ve been thinking for a while that I need to get back onto the blogging bandwagon and I’m not sure what’s inspired me today but I’m feeling overly optimistic and jazzy for a Monday. Which if you know me, is totally unlike me. I think I’ve slept off my fashion week hangover (and when I say hangover, I mean work-over) and have awoken feeling FRESH.

So here I am, sat with a blank excel sheet which is going to evolve into my weekly content calendar with some banging tunes playing and all I want to do is write a blog post. One of those days where you feel like you can conquer the world in your lunch hour.

Amid reading about the latest instagram updates, the meaning behind all the emojis on snapchat and fangirling over the thought of a dislike button Facebook, I’ve been reading a lot lately about the jealousy and feelings of inadequacy that social media can induce. (Yeah I know, social media loser over here).

Particularly this article on Elle, which has some valid points and some quite honestly, infuriating ones.

At its core, social media created a generation who can show the world their every move. From toilet selfies to their latest meal, we’ve all seen it all, and we’re all guilty. See some embarrassing snapchats as evidence:

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Of course we’re only going to post on social media the best parts of our lives. Only my best snapchat friends get my most horrific moments on record and I really don’t think the whole world wants to see them. Really it makes sense, the better part of our lives get more likes, which in turn is more rewarding and without getting into the science of why social media is so addicting, our brains love the likes. Like more than drugs.

SO, where has it all gone wrong? Why have people suddenly started feeling so jealous of other people’s lives that they wrote articles about it? Is there some sort of fog in their mind that they can’t remember that they too only post the best parts of their lives, therefore trying to make other people jealous?

Beneath the Valencia filters, everyone has problems. Nobody’s life is perfect. Yes, we all do have days where we want to throw our keyboard at our boss’ head or have a weeping fit in the loo, Elle was right on that. But maybe people need to take a step back and realise that fact, the next time they’re weeping because someone’s insta-life is looking particularly on fleek. Instead of letting it get you down, create a group chat with your best pals and post screenshots of the worst envy-inducing offenders. Honestly, it’s a lot more satisfying and hilarious. And before you accuse me of being Regina George from Mean Girls, WE ALL DO IT.

And if you’re really jelly, put your phone down and go out, party, live your life. That’s probably the best remedy of all.

Peace out,

SJW x

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#Overshare

I wrote this post ages ago, but the subject recently came up when I was chatting in work and the lols of it all reminded me to actually post it. So here goes…

I have to admit it, I love social media. I mean it goes with wanting to work in social media, right? However, I just don’t understand some people’s lack of awareness for overshare. It’s like we invented all these great communication tools and we just haven’t developed the social awareness of how to actually communicate on them.

There’s many forms of overshare; some which are forgivable and some which I genuinely have no time for:

  1. Those people who constantly give us updates of their lives
    Okay, so the stalker in all of us sometimes makes this forgivable, but please people, keep your status’ interesting! Show off, brag, be excited, sound happy and people might actually care. However, maybe refrain next time you go to tell the world that you’re tired, you’re sat in bed or even moaning about pointless things like someone cutting you up when you were driving. To be honest, that was what Whatsapp was invented for. Find a friend you can message at any time of the day so you can share your every moment from fan-girling, moaning, laughing to sending a barrage of that poo emoji. That person will either actually care about what you’re saying or actually have to right to tell you to stop talking.
  2. The purest form of overshare: Those who share their most horrific moments to the public sphere.
    I’m talking telling us every specific detail of your pregnancy, giving birth, a gaping injury or illness. A simple ‘I’m pregnant!’ will suffice; I don’t need details of where the baby is in your uterus, thanks. (Sadly a real example from my newsfeed).
  3. My biggest irk: Status’ aimed at people who can’t read them.
    It’s Mother’s Day and she doesn’t have facebook? It’s probably best if you converse with her your Happy Mother’s Day wishes. This also goes for a status about the loss of a loved one. Now, there is a fine line here, better than most I understand that everyone deals with the loss of a loved one in different ways and reaching out for a friendly voice via social media can be comforting at a tough time. However, at initially such a tough time I don’t think it should be made public for all to see. There’s a timeframe within which it’s sensible to release such details; I’ve even see someone ‘check in’ when they took a relative to hospital. Is that really needed? Those closest to you should be there no matter what, even without social media.

As much of a fan of social media I am, it’s still astonishing that people can’t grasp how public everything is on the internet. And if I’m being really boring, that’s really the problem with oversharing isn’t it? It might be funny to laugh at that serial oversharer, but you don’t really want the details of your toilet habits coming back to haunt you. So there you go, keep posting those jealousy inducing holiday photos, but please dear lord, do not do that irritating daily countdown from months before you go.

Over and out, SJW x

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Mates, Flakes and Long Distance Lols.

Recently a friend told me a little anecdote which I really agreed with, and helped inspire this post on something I’ve been meaning to write about for a while. The story went (if I remember it correctly) that there are three types of friends in life:
1. Those that you are friends with due to a situation. You’ll be friends with them within the situation but the friendship doesn’t span outside of this.
2. Friends that you make within a situation and the friendship lasts around three years.
3. Friends you have for life.

I guess when I moved away to university I was naïve about the fact I genuinely wouldn’t see some people again, I was probably too caught up in the excitement of change to realise it at the time. However, moving to university has made me really appreciate those friends who you are genuinely close to and know will always be around, whether or not you talk every day. It seems sad to lose friends in the number 2 category, but as you grow up I guess you realise everybody changes and people lead very different lives; add your own cliché here about ‘living for the moment’ ha!

I’ve always been a firm believer that distance shouldn’t ruin a true friendship and university has certainly tested this theory! In a way it sorts the friends in the second category to the ones in the third. I’ve touched upon friends from home already, but it’s great when you don’t have to necessarily talk every day, but you know when you need them they’ll be there and when you do see each other it’s the same as it always was. There’s something amazing you can’t lose when you can look back at your ‘ugly phase’ and laugh together!

There’s also something amazing you can’t lose with your friends at uni, in a totally different way, you somehow end up becoming each other’s second family; particularly those who you live with. Or you may just become their carer, as with me and AJP:

Alastair Leaving

I was blissfully unaware that at the end of second year these rocks in my life would be ripped away. The demon of the dreaded placement year or study abroad or whatever other name you would like to call it. Many of my friends were now set to be flying off to various parts of the world, leaving the rest of us back here to continue to cry at how frigging depressing uni (and third year) is. The end of summer felt like one long emotional goodbye. In particular, my non-boyfriend whom I’ve mentioned before, AJP, was leaving for America. I’m not even ashamed to admit that on his official leaving night we both cried, no sorry bawled, in a club when I had to leave. Hilariously, we were actually going to see each other again the next day. Obviously I was just so sad that I was losing the best cockblock I’ve ever had? Upon the actual departing of AJP, we decided the best way to go was a chest bump in the middle of Liverpool Street Station.

Considering how big a part of my life AJP is, I was slightly scared of what London would hold for me without him. There have obviously been times when I’ve missed him a lot, but at the same time it’s made me appreciate the lols when we do speak. It’s that great time where you don’t have to put up with his smelly socks everyday but you still get to share many a lol. The internet is a wonderful thing, and Skype, Whatsapp, Facebook and obviously Snapchat have all been amazing to stay in touch with everyone. I am also a fan of good old snail mail and send out postcards when I actually remember to pass a postbox. My flatmate said that this sounded like a ‘Dear John…’ idea, but it is definitely less romantic than she was imagining, considering some of the funny postcards I’ve sent, the meaning of the lovely sentiments on them have had to be explained to the Americans! When I turned up to a pastoral type tutorial the other day, my tutor hilariously bluntly asked me ‘How are you coping without your other half?’. I’ve said this to lots of people who ask if I miss AJP, I feel like he’s still here but without actually seeing him.

Obviously life is different in London without AJP around, but it definitely isn’t all bad. I’m not crying in a cave all day, every day. I need to put a shout out in here to everyone at uni who make the times I do actually turn up to the depressing hell hole (yeah, I’m loving uni right now) actually bearable, my lovely flatmate and, of course, I don’t know where I’d be without my main galdem, who get me through life with some hilarious snapchats!

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To round off this rambling post, if you have long distance friends of any kind, then I guess my thoughts are that it makes you appreciate the time you have with them more, look how happy I am on Skype ha! On an even brighter note, think of all the amazing holidays where you don’t have to pay for a hotel!

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Thoughtful SJW, over and out x